Treated Unfairly

Yesterday was the first time I cried in the office after getting a scolding from my manager. You might think I'm a crybaby but whatever my manager said to me yesterday was hurting. Damn hurting.

Maybe she having her menopuase, maybe she's in a bad mood. But that doesn't give her the right to insult me to that extent. I feel so demoralised and useless after her "speech". And you know what sparked her to intercom me and lecture me for 10min? Just because one of the customer did not thank me in the email. She happened to be in the loop and she saw that the customer did not write thank you to me. So she started her abusive railings at me. Saying that I am a disappointment to her, that customers will always thank her but not me cause I'm incompetent.

I believe I am competent. I believe I am a fast worker. Else how do you explain the large amount of money I generate every month? Up till now I am still the top sales in the company. Yes, we do not need to go out and look for customers. But then I stay in the office and make my customers feel good, talk to them, chit chat with them and therefore more purchases. Even if there's no purchases, I had built a very good rapport with most of my customers. I can finish my work within the day. I still have time to blog and play game. I AM NOT COMPETENT?!

On top of my own work, I still have to write CAR (corrective action report) and sometimes managed to finish my own work as well. Yes, sometimes I didn't follow up the cases up to her expectations. But did she realised that taking half-cooked rice and cooking them again needs time? I need to get to the root of the case and I've to ask the QC head what is going on. FYI, my company's factory is in China. So all the technical terms are in CHINESE. I've to access and write the CAR in English. Not really an easy task ok!

I do not feel justified. What my manager sees is only the surface. She does not know how much workload I have. I can come back from overseas and my email is flooded with more than 70 emails for me to clear WITHIN A DAY OR TWO, or even from an MC where my emails will flood to more than 50. HELLO!! You think so easy to do my job, you come do lah!! No need to insult me lor!! I just couldn't take what she said about me and broke down.

She said I'm not being sensitive to the customer's needs. What about the employee's needs?! Is she sensitive to what WE want? Oh fuck. I'm not your sandbag. Scold me just because customer never say thank you? So am I supposed to write an email back to the customer and reprimend them for not thanking me? Sheesh!!

During her "conversation", I had an urge to just hang up on her, pack my bag and leave. I do not need this. I left my previous job after my then manager screamed at me infront of customers at the showroom. I was selling cars then. I knocked off that night, and never went back. I do not need that. You want to teach, you don't scold. I was still new, you need not shout at me infront of the customers. Fuck him. Fuck LESLIE of Motor Traders. *Ptui*

This will be the last time I'm gonna tahan this....last time....I'm not hired to tahan or be the 出气筒 for my superiors. I'm here to work. If there's a valid reason, scold me all you want. Not like this.