First Church Wake

Today I went to a church wake. The first in my life. Even when my nanny passed away, the wake was at her place. But then again, when there's a wake, it means someone dear had passed away. Today that someone is Stacie's dad.

I went there, telling myself not to cry. I've been to too many funerals, and I know that it's a sombre place. But it's already a very sad place, so least I could do is to create laughter around me. When my grandparents passed away, I do not have friends around me to cry on, cause their wake and funerals were in Malaysia. So whenever my friends tell me that someone close to them passed away, I'll try to go down, so as to lend a shoulder or to give a hug.

I feel upset, not only because a great doting father had passed away, but that when Stacie messaged me on Tue night around 830pm, I didn't know at all, until 12:50am, when I checked my phone. It was a delay of 4hrs+. I felt bad I couldn't be beside her. Should I have noticed that earlier, I could have drove down or something. *Slap self*

Today, quite a few of our classmates turned up. I got to know a new friend, Natalie. I got to see Stacie's dad and mom..my heart goes out to her mom. When her mom started telling us about Stacie's dad, all I could do is smile and hold back my tears. As a stranger, we cry cause we're sad. What about the family members? That's also the reason why I never cry at funerals if I can help it. We're there to console the family members..not the other way round. But then..it's really quite sad. Some of us cried quite badly...

Whatever it is, I pray that Stacie's dad is happy now and in a happier place. Uncle, please look after Stacie. I know I'm repeating myself, like what I'd said to you when I stood beside your coffin. But please, look after her. She needs the strength to look after auntie. Auntie love you so much, so do Stacie. So look after her from Heaven please....thank you...